did you know that
those 2 first songs you played last night
are the songs i played over and over everytime i miss you?
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I learnt that the more I involve myself in the present,
the less I worry about my future..
end result? I fully aware of a happy feeling that's growing inside..

I realized that when I'm feeling down,
only I can pull myself out of the misery..
It's a decision away of whether to smile or to frown..
And I choose to smile..
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Unlike any other weekends, when I locked myself at home and try to get as much rest as I could..
Last weekends, I practically loaded myself with a lot of things..
Really happy though;p

Began with Friday..
It's a ballet performance night..
The title was "Coppelia" and it was performed by Singapore Dance Theatre..
I'm not going to write a full review upon this one, since Dennis has already written a really good one..You can find it in here

It was the first time for me watching ballet, and I have to say that I enjoyed it very much.
*I even already planned to watch Ballet Under The Star this May, Swanlake on December and Gisselle next March* hahaha

Rushing from the office, failed to complete my fasting that Friday (I wasn't suppose to eat meat, and I ate KFC out of rush hahahaha)..almost late to the theatre..
It was a day of fun;p
I slept at around 2am..after spending a quality time with my boyfriend over the phone;p

Moving on to Saturday..
I failed to wake up for the confession at 7am^^'
I went to Holl.V for breakfasat with ko Mar
Then went to drop a thing to my friend's place..
Did some shopping with Novi hahahaha *luv this part so much*
We managed to find some really good stuff with a great deal;p
*read: SALE* hehhee
After that, went straight away to Sentosa..playing beach volleyball with some other friends...
Went home feeling exhausted yet so happy:D

Then on Sunday..
As usual, I went to morning mass..Had a lunch with my friends then bought myself a new mouse *finally;p*
Previously, planned to go for another shopping session..but then I felt really tired that I went back and had a really good sleep..
Woke up at around 6pm..and rushing to see Sasa's choir concert at 8pm..
It was really good..

A bit about the choir itself..
It's a choir at the Cathedral of Good Shepherd in Singapore..
The choral director is Sir Peter Low, who's this year celebrating his 50 year anniversary of musical journey..
The concert itself is part of the celebration..
This is an article about the first concert held in December 2006
For those who's interested to see the choir yourself..
You could join the Sunday morning mass at 10am;p
*koq jadi promosi hahaha*

Well, anyway..
a new week has come..
Full of spirit..
Have a nice day everyone..
This is a true event

Yesterday morning when I was on my way to the bus stop, a man approached me and said: "小姐,请问"
which if translated means "Excuse me miss, can I ask..."

I looked at him, and then saw this big map he's holding..
then I said "oohh no no..thank you"

As I was about to walk away, I saw this little note on the top of his map which at a glimpse read "Kaki Bukit Ave 1"

So I turnt back to him and ask "Are you looking for an address?"

With such an effort, he tried to speak in English..
And apparantely yes..he was trying to find his way to that address..
I then explained to him that he could take bus no 15 or take a cab if he's in hurry..

Fast forward to this morning

I decided to come earlier to the office today.
I arrived at the bus stop at 8.45am, and a bit surprised to see how crowded the bus stop was.
What even more suprising was..
I met that man again..
He was there standing and smiling at me..
"Hi..thank you for yesterday"
Being polite, I asked whether or not he managed to find his way yesterday.

him: "sorry about yesterday, you seemed to be afraid"
me: "oooo no..i'm the one who's supposed to say sorry. I thought you're a salesman trying to offer something"
him: *laughing* "ooo the map is it?"
me: "yes.."
him: "you're chinese?"
me: "my grandparents are chinese..but I don't really speak chinese.."
him: "you look like chinese..especially your hair"
--errr...I don't quite get this part, but then I just smile hahahaha--

When I first came here, I experienced the same thing as that person.
Dressed in a formal outfit (since I was going to interviews) while holding a map..
It's really hard to find someone who's willingly to stop for a while and listen to what I wanted to ask.
When I approached them..Before I even finished my sentence "Excuse me.."
They just walked away with 'that' look in their face..
I thought what's wrong with me? I tried to be as polite and as friendly as I could..

As I spend more and more time here, I'm a bit understand why people did what they did to me.
There're a lot of salesmen and people who's asking for donation and stuff like that..
They dressed in a formal outfit..
Usually holding a map with a pen..
They're equipped with an incredibly friendly smile on their face..
And once you got caught by them, it's rather hard to walk away;p

Well then, everything happens for a reason..right?
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I wake up this morning with these thoughts in my mind:
What if today was my last day on earth?
How would I spend today?
What are things that I've always wanted to do but I haven't done?
Will people miss me?
Will people still remember me long after I go?
How much have I contribute to this world?

The answers to those questions:
If today was my last day on earth..
I'd be one of those people who would feel all the regret of all the things I should have done but I haven't..

If today was my last day on earth..
I'd call my boyfriend asking him to come back to Jakarta right away
I'd cash out all my savings..
I'd take the earliest flight to Jakarta..Having lunch with my family and friends..
I'd give my savings to my family..pack up all my stuff *making sure my family knows what to do with all of them*
I'd try the wall climbing in PIM *the one I've always wanted to try*
I'd take a walk with my boyfriend at our favorite spot..
I'd go to my grandpa's urn deposit *i don't know the term in english hehehe itu lohh tempat penyimpanan abu*
I'd go to church and ask for Sacrament of Confession..
I'd say goodbye to the people I love..

There are so many things that I've always postponed or put aside with so many reasons or things that I've planned but never have a chance to do..
I no longer know where to start the list..
I've always wanted to:
see snow..
bungee jump..
go to Japan and France..
have a dog..
build my own family..
build a school..

Ahhh well..
That concludes everything..
I haven't optimized the way I live my life..
Linderman: "I think there will come a time when a man has to ask whether he want a life of happiness or a life of meaning"

Nathan Pattreli: "I like to have both"

Linderman: "It's not possible..It's two very different paths.."

Linderman: "To be truly happy, a man must live absolutely in the present..no thoughts of what's gone before and no thought of what lies ahead"

Linderman: "But a life of meaning, a man is condemned to wallow in the past and obsessed about the future"

I just finished watching Heroes episode 18..
For all of you who's not following Heroes...you have to watch this show..
For all of you who's waiting for the next episode..let's just hope that this show won't end up like Lost;p
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